I got no money, got no secrets....

 
rant by Ugly Joe
categories: My Room, Design 4
2003-02-01 00:00:00
 
Well, as promised, the new backgrounds are in place. If it still looks like the old one, hit refresh a few times or stop using AOL or something. They're there.

Anyway, I have this hatch behind my moniter. It looks like this:


It's just sorta there. There's another hatch in the room, over by the door, but it's locked. This one, however, is not locked. What awaits behind it...? Small aliens? Super cool ray guns? The batcave? Nazi gold? Radioactive steam? Mr. Roboto? Cans of cheese? A cache of arrows? Another hatch? A cute kitten? Spider eggs? Superman? 5.1 Dolby surround sound? The jimmy jakes of consequence? A toaster? Windows 3.1? A corn-dog stand? A broken PS2? A bear? A black hole? A dancing koala? Antacid pills? Jugs of orange juice? Silly hats? Silly puddy? Small mechanical cats? A pair of pliers? A copy of Yoda Stories that runs under XP? A bear filled with honey? A deoderent bar? A keyblade? A blacklight? 265 NES games including Tengen Tetris? Extreme beach volleyball action? Wheat Thins? Zwan's new album? A Hang-On/Safari Hunt dual cart for Sega Master System? The Doobie Brothers? A Homer Simpson bobble head? A puke green sofa and an ottoman? Used fingernail clippers? Juggling balls? Two freaking ghetto fans? A broken phone? Captain Caveman? Maple syrup? Someone still reading this paragraph? My buddy list? Bill Gates' contract with Satan, signed in blood (for effect)? Stinky farts? A mySQL database? My will to keep typing this crap? An anal thermometer? Peach rings that taste like windex lite? Moo with thirteen O's? The stapler? A bootleg couch? Far too much duct-tape? A brick that plays 3DO games? Blast proccessing? The Price is Right losing theme? Derek Smart? Karnov? Tubs of ramen? Crazy glue? Increased search traffic due to random phrases? Tape-leg? Klax?

...

To that, I say nay. What truly lies behind the sandwich hatch door is truly....quite lame:


Yeah...it's got some bricks and some kinda valve thing. But it's totally for holding sandwiches, though. And it looks like this thing goes down nine stories, so I'm guessing it could hold quite a few sandwiches. Yeah. So now I'm really really bored. Someone email me or something. meh...